Unforgiveness is like fire that smolders and smothers.

Revenge is poisoning

Revenge is wanting more than justice. It is becoming an unforgiving person and harboring hatred. Justice is not always served.

Bad people get away with bad things. If we insist life to be fair we will be disappointed. Then what will we do?

The desire for revenge is a bottomless pit. The problem lies with an unforgiving heart.

Unforgiveness is like fire that smolders and smothers. It is destructive because it is most content to stay low to the ground, where it goes unnoticed, quietly doing it’s deadly work. It flares up and explodes occasionally but it is mostly an invisible killer of the soul.

This should not be confused with healthy responses to loss. Like the quest for justice. Like anger — a legitimate emotional response to loss. These responses indicate that a normal person has just suffered loss and has begun the process of healing.

Unforgiveness is different. It is ruinous. It can occur on a large scale (countries vs. countries) or on a small scale (gang warfare, family feuds.) In the name of unforgiveness, people can do terrible things.

Signs of an unforgiving heart:

Claiming rights (“Who do you think you are? You think you are so smart.” or “You can’t talk to me that way” or “I have the right to be angry because of what they did.”)

Sensitive to small slights (“He looked at me funny” or “She pulled in front of me like they own the road.”)

Obsessed with the past (“My parents were never there for me” or “I will never forget what she said to me when I was little.”)

They are convinced that their circumstances are worse then anybody else’s (“You don’t know what I went through.”)

Gains pleasure in being a victim (“Let me tell you what I know about misery…” or “If you knew what they did to me, you would understand why I am the way I am.”)

Complaining and demanding pity (because then they have a sense of power over their enemies whom they blame for their problems and anybody who will listen.)